Following their 26 to 9 thrashing of the Wild Turkeys, the Homers were
approached by Heineken Beer to appear in their next advertising campaign.
No big stars, no chicks in bikinis, no mercy, simply a group of normal people
tearing up C league on a beautiful L.A. day with a cooler by the side:  it 
just doesn't get any better than this.<p>

Stat of the day:  the Homers committed only 10 offensive outs throughout the 
entire game.  From the second on, the Homers took an out every inning because 
of the mercy rule, and at the end of every trip through the order, the Homers 
took an out due to a shortage of Homer women.
<pre>
    Homers          6  9  1  4  2  2  2    26
    Wild Turkeys    1  3  1  0  0  4  0     9
</pre>
Actually, it could get better:  where's the rest of the team?  The Homers 
turnout was pretty weak, a season low of nine players:  Richard (SS/P/1B/3B), 
Jeff (C/RF), Scott (P/RF/1B), Amy (RF/SS/3B), Don (LF), Dave (2B/CF/SS), 
Ron (CF/C), Holly (3B/1B/LF), and Tim (1B/SS/2B).  It was the Wild Turkeys' 
misfortune to run into this lineup, which could probably beat half the teams 
in the B minor league.<p>

This game was a nightmare offensively:
<pre>
    Richard  0/5
    Jeff     2/5
    Scott    2/5
    Amy      2/5
    Don      0/5
    Dave     1/5
    Ron      0/5
    Holly    1/5
    Tim      1/4
</pre>
The nightmare belongs to the Wild Turkeys, for that's a list of outs/at-bats.
The team batting average for this game is .795.  Really. These games are hell 
on recruiting.  Everyone hit well, with a probable team record of eight home 
runs.  Don hit three, two of which were monsters to right (including one 
grand slam), Ron hit two, and Richard, Holly, and Tim hit one each.  The Don 
monster is hot, having hit seven in the last three games.<p>

Defensively, the Homers started switching positions by the bottom of the
second.  In fact, in the last inning, the positions were assigned 
alphabetically by first name based around Scott at first base (S 3, T 4, A 5,
Da 6, Do 7, H 8, J 9, Ri 1, Ro 2), allowing Dave a chance to feel the terror
of a ground ball headed toward shortstop and Ron a chance to catch a pitch
behind the back.  The most notable defensive plays were two tough guy plays:
Jeff took a throw from Don off the arm, and Richard took a line drive up the
middle off the stomach; for the record, both lived up to the team motto of
"don't rub it, don't touch it."<p>

Our next game is Tuesday, July 25, on field H2 of the Rose Bowl against the
Roving Marauders, Karen's team, a team that Scott, Jeff, Ron, Mary, and
Richard have all played for.